Let me write something !

Writing has always been always been a difficult task for me. I often start then simply write one page and that’s it. Either I don’t have anything more to write or just because i’m not any more interested into writing. But this time I really wish to write something, I don’t know why, whether its inspiration by my brother or there is some other reason . So like most of the other decent blogs, in this first post of my blog I wish to write something about myself  and i.e. all true and factful. Whatever I am writing is directly from my heart. I need a companion who can console me and that I am looking for into my writings. Whenever I get sad, I simply read one of my writings and that give me a lot of consolation and peace I want other’s to know who really am.I .

If I have to write about myself in few words, I’ll simply say that I have an optically illusion-ed image. Those who know me well enough, they only know who I am, always cynosure of every gathering, both during my schooldays and college life. During my schooldays I was the real Bond, had been good in studies and always among top three-four of the class. I got the second rank in the district during high-school examination and that’s only because of the teacher who got the 50 rs note pasted into my didn’t betray me (kidding). I always had a very big friend circle and that too all the guys of my type, no studies during classes and our only motivation to sit in the class used to be not to allow the teacher to teach anything , We used to throw chalks and ask unnecessary questions. But these things never affected our studies. Since studies had always been our first preference and all of us used to be masters of our own topic, we all were considered good students and although being a bit devilish, all the teachers loved us.

During my school days, the teacher who inspired me most is Mr V.K. Shukla. He is the real teacher I respect him and he also love me very much. He guided me during my those early days when I was having no idea about my goods or bads, but sadly, I never realized this thing until the last day of school I made mistakes too often during those days but instead of taking any disciplianry action, he always told me the consequence of my mischievous deeds. I used to ask useless ,unnecessary, and foolish question in his class each, and each time his veins got tightened that’s just because of my mischief. I have never seen such a teacher, and that’s the sole reason that whenever I go to my school, he is the only one whom I search for. Although all other teachers also love me but its his love that matters most to me The second teacher who inspired me is my Maths teacher Mr. U.N. Singh, literally speaking I like him just because he always supported me in my everything. Whenever I committed a mistake then he was the only one who stood besides me…

The thing that I miss most in my life is my F-R-I-E-N-D-S, my school days friends. Its my lovely, devilish group that I miss most. Mayank, Prateek, Anurag, Ankur,Rahul, Gaurav, Iove them all. They all are of same nature. Mayank is my best friend, perhaps he is the only in the world with whom I share my personal views, he was the only one who followed me in kota and its him only who always used to score same marks as me in every exam and again its him only wo whom I look for an advice whether its correct or incorrect.. When the things come to knowledge, I guess that there is only one name who can beat me and that’s of Gargi Singh. She is presently at IITR, people say that she is at better place than me. and its again a general thinking but I differ. I am a man who always is satisfied with himself.. I know I am as good as her. She is there just because she scored five more marks than me. Had I got these marks, I would also have been there. I got 47 marks in Maths in JEE exam which is in no way a simple task and that too when the cut off marks are below 25. What to speak of my chemistry when I came back home after giving the exam, I simply told to my father that if I’ll clear cut off marks in Maths then I’ll be there at IIT and I got 81 marks in it and a total of 175, that deserve a rank of 2500 in the most reputed competition of the country, but here comes the fate, i never thought that I’ll not able to clear up the cutoff marks of my favorite subject, the subject because of which I was there in the top second batch of my coaching Class. I’ve studied that subject from the best teachers of India but despite of it I was not able to clear up the cut off marks.Had that been the story in Maths, I would have never felt regretted, but I simply got failed because of Physics and that’s the thing which shakes my mind. My heart gets filled with regret. Had there been one question more and I would have been at a better place but whatever is the case I treat it as God’s desire, In life there are certain cases where we don’t get what we really deserve. In a race it’s not necessary that its only the best player who will win it, it further depends upon the day and circumstances, and luck too. There are persons who don’t believe in luck at all and i was also one among them but before 9^th April,2006. That day changed my life totally, and thats because of which I wish to forget my memories of KOTA. In my heart, I have all the records of each and everyday, my friends Ankit Garg ,Naman Gautam, Gagandeepd singh ,Vijay Kahtod.. all are IITians now and me ? I am not pessimistic but I don’t get the reason why I failed ? Where did I loose and where they gained ? I didn’t watch a single movie in Kota I didn’t miss a single class of any subject and despite of it I am the victim.I don’t know the reason, why ?

I don’t wish to write more about KOTA because whenever I think of it, I get sentimental, get filled with regret that all my dreams were wasted. my brother got a good rank in JEE and my father was expecting me to get a rank under 500 but I was not able to fulfill his dream. I am not a good son.. I am again getting seriously sentimental and writing directly from my heart. I miss my school friends, my school canteen, the bicycle by which I used to go to my school in class 5^th, but that’s the rule of nature that thing which are once gone will never return.back. But if I’ll ever get a chance to wear again my that brown color trousers and cream colored shirt, tie with stripes on it, and a belt over which C.P. Vidya Niketan is written, I’ll give everything of mine for that. But again I know that it’s not possible since the woods are lovely, dark and deep but I have promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep…..